After this, I will forever hold my peace

Last na to.

There’s been a lot of hullabaloo recently, which was related to the issue in my past post.

I know I shouldn’t be even wasting my time on it anymore, because quite frankly it isn’t affecting me or my situation. I may be stepping down one level as a person by even addressing the issue, but I really think I should say this and forever hold my peace… until I get to talk to the guy personally. Hell, I might end up just stating everything here, and save me the time.

Sa lahat ng mga kaibigan ko na nagsabi na wag ko na patulan… patawarin ninyo ako 😉 di ko na matiis eh.

As usual, no names will be involved. I’m not a person who “destroys” reputations behind their backs (or in any way for that matter)… which is hardly the courtesy I’ve been extended. Then again, I didn’t deserve such a courtesy in the first place, so at least it would be reasonable to assume that I’ve already taken enough “flak” to merit as punishment for my actions…

Now we’re even 😉

First, I will say that there is only one thing I regret, and that’s not informing the guy… and in turn the only reason I even regret it, is because I consider him to be a friend – and would still like to be – in the spirit of being mature adults. Because make no mistake, if I didn’t know him, I couldn’t care less if he felt bad. That’s the only reason why I am tolerating his actions. As I said, I deserve every bit of dirt thrown at me as a result of what I did, and I already said that I will not deny any accusations with regards to my past, or any assumptions with regards to my character/integrity.

I believe, considering all the “rumors” I’ve been hearing in the background, that he’s made good use of his “idle time” to do just that. And I will not call any foul. After all, everyone is entitled to their own method of “coping.” I may not “get” what he’s trying to accomplish, but I’ll give that to him.

So I’ve done something “wrong,” and he has pretty much done what he could do to get back at me. So I guess it’s time I stop feeling bad already. Therefore, I will not tiptoe anymore, as I have no obligation to be “polite” at this juncture.

So the reason I’m posting now, given that we’re even, isn’t because I’m trying to make a statement that you should do this or that, or what not. You do what you want to do, but here’s the thing that amuses me, and something I think you should consider carefully for your own sake.

• You know you’re doing something wrong when the thing you’re doing, ends up going the opposite way you’d expect. A simple proof of that is when people who I never even met in my life end up sympathizing ¹ I’m not saying they’re on my side, but I can definitely say from what I know, that they aren’t on yours. with my situation – simply because they consider what your doing as inappropriate, to say the least.
• It’s very telling that all the women in my past relationships are still good friends of mine. While I may or may not have done them wrong (haven’t we all), and while we may have our differences, the fact remains that we still have a certain degree of respect for one another. Given that fact, maybe… just maybe, I’m not that bad a person you make me out to be.
• In case no one ever told you, guilt trips work the opposite way when it comes to women who aren’t interested in a person. Especially if they had already made it clear. I call BS on whatever “signals” you claim to have interpreted… and what you’re doing is unfair to her.
• The fact that you’re even resorting to using guilt trips is enough reason for me (or any other person) to get in the way of something that should be between the two of you, because guess what: I care for her. It doesn’t matter to me if she cares about me or not – All I know is that I don’t want to see her hurt… hurt for my sake, or anyone else’s for that matter. As for you, for a person who claims to “love” her, I’d like you to take a breather, look back at what your doing – and ask yourself if you really do. Even I, the oh-so-evil person you think I am, would never do that to a woman, whether I liked her or not.

So given those facts, what exactly are you trying to accomplish? Is it going the way you had hoped it would? The awful truth is that you’re digging your own hole. I didn’t have to do anything to defend myself, and here you are sealing your own fate by hassling people who don’t, and probably shouldn’t give a flying fuck about our lives – yours, mine, and even hers. You’ve basically demolished, by your own devices, any chance you had in getting the kind relationship you would have wanted… and I’m being very generous when I say that.

You have to wake up to the truth dude. There’s nothing waiting for you here, you have to move on. I’m perfectly aware that I’m the last person who should be saying these things, but I’m led to believe that the people who should be telling you these things (your true friends) aren’t doing their job!

I think it’s fair to say that what you’re doing at this point is not “justice” of any kind – for any side. It’s whining, plain and simple. I’m pretty sure everyone, friend or not, will agree with what I just said. You may have had a right at the beginning, but that only gives you the right to focus your anger on me, alone… NOT getting other people involved… people who didn’t (and don’t) even want to be involved in the first place.

As someone who hurt you, I accept what you’re doing and will not ask you to stop for my sake… and I will try my hardest not to judge you as you have judged me, and I am truly sorry.

I’m asking you to stop as person, human, and [hopefully] as a concerned friend. Because if you value your friendship with her, you’d really have to get a grip and move on. You’ve made sure yourself that your so-called “love life” died… do you really want to take it further and even ruin the friendship you have with her? The friendship of a person you claim to “love?”